21.

Life's a perfect natural disaster.

People like ma famille, mes amis & mon ami complete my life.
Without them, it just doesn't seem perfectly natural anymore.

It'll be a disaster.

November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 / September 2007 / October 2007 / November 2007 / December 2007 / January 2008 / February 2008 / March 2008 / April 2008 / May 2008 / June 2008 / July 2008 / August 2008 / September 2008 / October 2008 / December 2008 / January 2009 / February 2009 / March 2009 / April 2009 / May 2009 / June 2009 / August 2009 / September 2009 / October 2009 / December 2009 / January 2010 / February 2010 / March 2010 / April 2010 / August 2010 /

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

on rotation; christina aguilera - hurt

i wonder if christina cried when she sang this song. hhaha.
because i cried the first time i heard it.
heh.

anyhoots.
it rained the whole day.
and i practially edited pictures from 4 till 6.
that's how bored i am.

im sorry i have to write this. i have no choice.
heh. my home phone's out, my hp has no value.

ahnaf;
i hope you're aware that i love you very much. probably much more that you can think of.
i know i've wronged you at certain points of time.
i know im not telling you exactly how i feel directly to you.
im sorry i resorted to doing that.
sometimes i hated myself for not telling you how i feel.
sometimes whenever i showed you how i was feeling, you turn your back on me.
it hurts me. but i know, eventually, we will be okay.
im sorry if i was being too hard on you. perhaps i expected too much from you sometimes.
i dont like to hold you back. from doing whatever you want.
just as long as you're happy.
im sorry if i ever put the blame on you or jump to conclusions.
since i've not been seeing you often, then i guess this is the only way for me to tell you.
i hope you'll help me be more open with you. its not that i never tried.
i tried, but i held it back.
you've been so patient with me through the good and bad times. and i really appreciate you for tolerating with my attitude and antics.
i would want to be with you for as long as the years i've lived. or perhaps maybe longer than that.
i may not show you how deep my love sinks for you, but i can tell you.
actually, i relate how i feel by the lyrics of that song.
oh.
once again, happy anniversary, love.

im shure many of us relate how we feel through that song.
im one of them. are you?

nothing's on rotation.

so anyway. i'll be blogging about monday.

its christmas. so yeah.

i woke up at 0745. met up with dillah, her sister and syiqah at the interchange at 0930.
then we walked to tampines swimming complex.
we paid for some stuffs and then headed up to the gym.
signed in, got changed and got started. heh.
we signed out one hour later.
then we went swimming.
it was fun laa girls. =)

only took two pictures though.
batery was flat.


i look kental, hokays. wakaka.


syiqah&dils.

and then we were off. had our shower then lunch at longjohn's. thanks girls. =)
badminton, next? no racket, please. huahua.
we headed to dillah's block.
and then lepak with her.
and her adorable little brother at the void-deck playground.
?
haha. ape jeee.
anyways. we headed home at 6.
fun, fun laa. hehee.

and then i got bored.
i did these.





dont know if you can see the words though. heh.

yeah. so.

happy anni, ahnaf. =)

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you but I know you won't be there

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you
Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes and see you looking back

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself
If I had just one more day, I would tell you how much that
I've missed you since you've been away

Oh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line to try to turn back time

I'm sorry for blaming you for everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself

By hurting you

iLOVEyou.

on rotation; sting ft cheb mami - desert rose

a rainy day, yet again.

sometimes the weather explains your mood. and sometimes, it's true. heh.

i want to go find a job tomorrow. starbucks fooled me. wakaka.
anyways. lets not give up.
my results are going to be out soon. and i mean middle of next week. well, most probably. according to my lecturer.
i just pray for the best. heh.
speaking of which, i have yet to post the reply slip.
ergh.

you know.
sometimes i envy people because they're strong. not physically but mentally and emotionally.
sometimes i wished i was like them.
i wonder how they deal with things.
or perhaps there's a story behind them being strong?
i dont know.

what i know is, right now. my parents are trying hard to deal with the bills and the expenses.
and whenever i see or hear them talk about money and how we're lacking of it, i feel guilty.
i mean. we're the children and we've been using up their hardearned money on what we want. what we want and not what we need. of course it's their responsibility to care for us. but we're growing older.
thats why im desperate for a job now. where i earn my own money, splurge on whatever i need. i use my own money when i want to go out. and i dont have to ask them for money.
money is always the issue laa. haha.
we complain that there's nothing to do at home that's why we go out. but there is something we can do. for me, i have to do the chores.

so yeah.
im desperate for a job.
just so i can pay for my own expenses.

well.
got to go.
chao-chee-bye. =)

on rotation; lenny kravitz - again

well.
i woke up at 1100 today.

anyways.
MY PRESENT ARRIVED TODAY AT NOON!!!!
wakaka. like, finally.
the postman actually laughed because he saw me rushing to the door. my mum took the package and passed it to me. hahahah.
then i camwhored with ALL moi presents. heeeee.
g's outfitters top, najiha's 2 little keychain teddies, baby's necklace and the new arrival, dee's fcuk her.

i came over bf's place today.
poor baby's sick, ey.
and then i went home at around eight.

pictures are in very random order.

on rotation; robbie williams - better man

well i just got back from watching night at the musuem.
it was great.
got some pictures but not uploaded yet.
met fadillah at the mrt station. then headed to cityhall mrt at met up with bf and magic.
after waiting for idontknowhowlong, we went for late lunch at longjohn's marina square. then headed off to purchase tickets for the movie.
you peoples should go catch night at the museum. heh.

anyways. we were bummed on where to go after the movie.
so we walked by millenia walk, to the suntec city mall, to the koi pond and to the fountain of wealth.
i had a great time. especially with you. =)
how can i not love you, hah?

oh yes.
yesterday was one hell of a kecoh time at the library.
i went to mcd's to meet up with g at first. i forgot dude was coming along. heh. and i didnt know his friend was coming. and then my sister joined later at mcd's.
after we all had our lunch, we proceeded to the library.
i've got some pretty hilarious pictures to post up. but the computer's being a bitch.
haha.
oh well.
borrowed four books. i read one of the books in a day.
i'll be starting on the other one most probably tomorrow. heh.

urghhh.
mr postman is not here yet laa.
its already a week can! hmmphh.

someone just snored. akhakhaakhakhka.

okay im a little tired. no actually im not.
my back hurts.

i want you can?
can.
ahahahaha.
bye.

on rotation; Telepopmusik - Breathe

im back agaaain.

i want to go catch night at the museum laa.
go this friday can, b?
wait. tickets expensive. cb.

anyhoots.
i friendster-ed, blogged and camwhored.
reason no other than being bored.
blergh.

where is MR POSTMAN?
mr postman, please come tomorrow. =)

so erm. i'll be sleeping late tonight.

oh.
the other day i went window shopping alone at cityhall. haiyah.
too bad i didnt have cash.
i wanted to get a book, a magazine, a quiksilver polo, a ripcurl longsleeved top and ripcurl sundress.
that is why im desperate for a job. asjhga;sdh
apply for another job laa like this.
because like i said, i want to collect money just in time. =))

well.
this year has been great. it was also hard for me. haha.
i managed to pull through yet again.

this year's birthday was pleasant. although i was missing three people. nonetheless, without all of them, i wont be how i am now.
the letter g gave to me, i was holding back tears laa when i was reading it. ahahaha. shut up g, dont laugh. come on laa, we were in mcd's. with this guy sitting at the table next to ours gesturing and smiling to himself. which was scaring g and najiha. huahua. so yeah.
18th december was pleasant, yet unpleasant.
but let bygones be bygones. =)
A BIG THANK YOU TO PEOPLE WHO WISHED ME AND THOSE PRESENT FOR THE OUTING.
come to think of it, the same people celebrated it with me. ahaha.

then erm. i didnt go anywhere on the 19th.
dee called. ahahaha. gereks laa.
the moment the clock struck 12midnight, messages were reeling in sia. wahaha.
from the advanced, to the early, to the last minute wishes, it didnt matter to me.
i was remembered. =)
on the 19th uh. i slacked at home. i woke up early then fell asleep in front of the tv. talked to g at night. then magic called my phone. hahah.

like abit late to talk about these stuffs. haha. i was too preoccupied in posting the pictures rather than posting an entry. heh.

then today. bf called. i was still asleep. huaa.
godknowshowlongitooktogetready. i was still ironing my hair when he already reach. sorry. hehe.
we went to a workshop to fix his headlights. then off to parkway for lunch.
lepak for awhile before i went home.
not enough, can? =) thanks eh.

okay im off now. i'll update if i have anything.

on rotation; armin van buuren - white sand

first of all. fuck you, blogger. fuck you.

okay. some more pictures. but stupid blogger dont let me upload. two attempts still cannot. cb balls.

hmph.

met bf for awhile just now. =)

im bored.

babe. i know i cant be there for you every single second of your life. *sound familiar? hehehe* but i can always be there to listen to you. i know you're strong. so keep it up okay. =)

im really fucking bored can?

well hello.

yesterday was great.
thanks for everything guys.
the wishes. the presents.
the pictures. haha.
and you too. thank you.

i'll let pictures talk. =)











okay i stop here. i'll continue.
there's more pictures. =)

i still yearn for you.

it rained today. no wait. it was pouring. so bf cant come meet me. =(

watched saw3 halfway. then i got bored.
i decided to go out alone. since g was asleep. hahaha.
we stayed up till 6 this morning. talking trash, watching tv.
we hung up then went straight to bed. i slept till noon.

baby's not home yet. i guess.

well im going to have breakfast with anggerek and najiha tomorrow morning. and the day will be spent with them.
as much as i want you to come, i dont think that'll happen.

so i went out alone at half past four today. windowshopped at cityhall, marina square. went to mph and hmv. hmm.
i went to quiksilver. but men's size all big. then go flash and splash. looked at the jeans. size all got but none is nice. then i went home.
i spent 4hours outdoors today.
.

actually im lazy to go into details.
so i'll update tomorrow.

i'll try
try not to lose you

wooh!

hahaha. i just got back from jogging ten minutes ago.
jogged from my block, through the park and to the stadium. ran three rounds.
thought of doing some fitness but bleargh. i passed. haha.
i jogged for a few distances from stadium and back home.
felt good uh. tired but goood.
worth the run.
just the wind blowing into my face and hair. and watching around 14 kids having a mini relay. cute laa those kids. hahaha.

mayn~
got no time to talk to ahnaf laa. he's busy finding a job and his activities.
maybe that's how he felt when i became a commitee member. retribution? huahaua
im prepared for it anyway.
i've got a lot to tell him. and i mean alot. but since he's tired and coming home late, i guess i'll just forget about telling him.
anyway.
i dont know what happened to the plan of coming to his place today. perhaps he forgot? well erm. he wanted me to come. i guess he forgot. oh, humans.
just as i thought of telling him how happy i am to get to see him finally.
i've been waiting for his call. everyday. oh well.
i called him this morning but he was still asleep. and then i called again at 2 and he's not at home.
okay i understand his prepaid is running low. at least call before you leave? appreciate. =)
and i dont know why im crying now. haha.
okay im overreacting. woots.

blergh.

song now currently on repeat. yes literally repeat, is telepopmusik. haha. thanks to diyanah haris.
house chillout gerek uh. i shall listen to lush before i go to sleep tonight.
need more of those songs.

introducing telepopmusik; breathe

I brought you something close to me,
Left for something you see though your here.
You haunt my dreams
There's nothing to do but believe,
Just Believe.
Just Breathe.

Another day, just believe,
Another day, just breathe
Another day, just believe,
Another day. Just breathe.

I'm used to it by now.
Another day, just believe.
Just breathe. Just believe.
Just breathe.
Lying in my bed,
Another day, staring at the ceiling.

Just breathe. Another day.
Another day, just believe.
Another day.
I'm used to it by now.
I'm used to it by now.
Just breathe. Just believe.
Just breathe. Just believe.
Just believe. Just breathe.
Just believe.
Another day, just believe.
Another day.
Another day, just believe,
Another day, just breathe,
Another day (I do believe).
Another day(so hard to breathe)
Another day(not so hard to believe)
Another day. Another day.

im going to go baaattthhhee.

hello.

okay.
i woke up at 1130 today. had breakfast after shower. called the bf.
and then watched tv.
got ready at around 1300. only decided on what to wear at 1430. ahahaha. okay.
so i got out of the house by halfpast 3. met g and naj at pasir ris mrt.
we walked around whitesands. looking for a job. but all kental laa. huahuauha.
so we decided to go to tampines for lunch at mcd's. camwhored. haha.
then proceeded to starbucks. and yey. i applied for a part time.
i just hope i get some bucks just in time.
then we walked around tampines mall. g wanted to go petsafari so we proceeded to eastpoint. whilst walking out of tampines mall, we saw nabilla and family. hehehe.
nice to see them laa. hahah. caught up for awhile. and then we were on our seperate ways.
oh. i didnt know eastpoint was quite big. or should i say spacious. ahaha. g and i tried on some tops.
then we proceeded to challenger. i played call on duty 3 but i only lasted for a mere minute laa. lol. then g played. while we were waiting for khairi and dan.
then dan played when the boys arrived. oh. najiha went home. so yeah. g and i got bored. we meddled with the hi-fis. ahahaha. im sorry if i startled anyone at the shop.
so we took the bus back to tampines. since g wanted to get SOMETHING. hahaha.

well erm.
i think im not going to put a password. but i'll keep the script anyway. thank you dee. heh.

something is bothering me. but i shant talk about it here. nor talk about it anywhere.
i like to keep things discreet. cannot help it laa. unless i really feel i need to talk it out.
ey. better not have mentioned it in here right hodob. haiyah.

lets just forget about that.
dont know if i should go out with bf tomorrow. afraid he's tired.
oh well.

i better go sleep now uh.
i have to wake up at 6. im going for a jog.
pms laa. i need to clear my mind.

im just hoping, that something like last year wont happen again. im just hoping. not asking for anything.

hello and welcome back.

lets see.

i watched supernanny at 2100 to 2200hours. and then prison break for an hour.
wentworth miller is hot stuff. woots!
ahaha.

im waiting for the call.

and each day im sitting at home, im gaining weight.
im going for a jog this saturday.
probably tomorrow i'll be going out for job hunting.
i'll ask someone to accompany me. if not, then i'll be better off alone.

should i try starbucks? huahuaa.
i want to try retail though.
or should i go back to skatesports?
how about bookstores? librarians?
but i want to try retail.
perhaps i should try starbucks.
yeah.

so erm. i'll have to travel to dhoby ghaut tomorrow.
i guess im off now laa.
nothing to talk about anymore.

see you.

i might be putting a password to this blog.

anyways.

heeelllloooo.
hehe.

well. erms.
i had a throbbing migraine yesterday. therefore i tuned in early.
i missed taboo and inuyasha on artscentral. dammit.

thank god im fine today. supernanny and prison break laa balls. ahaha.

i woke up at 1030 this morning. had my shower ten minutes later. then i watched tv.
played my keyboard. got a new song. clocks by coldplay. haha. quite easy to play. repetitive keys.

i might be going out with bf this saturday.
and i will be going out with my girls this monday. weehooi~

oh.
i got a letter from school!

quote; congratulations on graduating from the ite college east!
YEEEYYY! ahaha. invitation to the graduating ceremony. but its next year laa *hodob.
8feb.
oh what the hell. im seeing the classmates again. =)

hmm.
now msn-ing with nurul and one of my classmates.

im bored.

* bodoh. its just spelt backwards.
haha. and i used to talk backwards with my classmates.
hilarious uh.

okay i update more.
bye.

ola

actually im writing out of boredom laa.
and the wake at the void deck opposite my block is disturbing. sorry. but yeah.

anyway.

HAPPY 43RD DADDY!
i pray for your safety and well being always. =)

my turn is coming. huahua.
and somewhere in the middle of this year, i already got my present. heh.

dont look at me. look at the necklace. hehe. =)
so that's the present.

im just bored laa.

update again laters.

thank you baby.
love is so you.